Monday, June 11, 2007
A very depressing weekend.
On Friday night, my mum called bagitau that one of her best fren dari kecik, Kak A dah meninggal. I was so shocked! She was doing radiotherapy, her breast cancer supposed to be on the mend. Kak A died of viral infection to the brain. A supposedly common cause for cancer patients.
I saw her just last time raya, was thinking to visit her again this time. We talked abt breast cancer and the symptoms. Also the 'illnesses' that plague people that had done breast removal and in the smaller degree, breast biopsi. Still cannot make it into my head that she was gone.
Ingat masa kecik2, dia tinggal kat flat blok sebelah kitorang. My mum nanti pegi bersembang and me, being clumsy....slalu jatuhkan barang atas karpet dia. Air merah, air ungu...all types of air. kalau orang lain, mesti dah kena marah, tapi Kak A...relax ajer.
Lepas main2 with my frens, aku bawak diorang pegi lepaks umah dia. Still can remember her voice...
All are sweet memories.
She and my mum had the same fate. They understand each other so well, pahit maung kehidupan di hadapi bersama. Lost contact for a while, back there...but bila jumpa, boleh sambung the friendship as if there is no lost time...
Yes, she did some things that are questionable. But, not all of us are born priviledged. Most of us have to carve our own path thru the jungle of life. She is above all, a very brave lady. As brave as my mum in going on with her life even tho a lot of people want to see her crumple and fade away.
Hope Min (her daughter) can go thru life ngan sabar. Be brave Min!
At least, she is now free from the pain....
Semoga Kak A di masukkan ke dalam golongan orang-orang yang mukmin.
p/s: after this, all other things seem insignificant. mortality....live life to the fullest, ain't i always tell my frens that? go on with ur dreams, don't wait. you might not have the chance again. i had chosen this path, with eyes wide open. to all my sisters, choose yours carefully.
btw, death is always an option, either you go down kicking and screaming, or you make provisions for those that you will leave behind. no regret, rite? no regret.....no what ifs.....
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The race of man shall perish, but the eyes
Of trilobytes eternal in stone,
And seem to stare about in mild surprise
At changes greater than they have yet known.
- T.A. Conrad
To see a world in a grain of sand,
And a heaven in a wild flower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour.
- William Blake,
excerp from Auguries of Innocence.